Lost Star Read online

  Aubrey couldn’t draw a full breath. His lungs were too full of liquid. He suspected that they were bleeding. He had to whisper. “Fine, put me back in, asshole.”

  They did.

  Determined to kill himself outright, Aubrey tried to suck in the blade-cold air and screamed it right back out.

  * * * * *

  He woke up on the deck again. He coughed, spewing hot, wet liquid that tasted strongly of copper and other things. He winced. Lung damage. He wasn’t dead, but he would be soon.

  “There are faster ways to gain compliance. Pity I need your mind intact.”

  “Fuck…you.” Aubrey barely got the words out.

  Another trip to the airlock.

  This time, he couldn’t scream. His lungs were too full of ice for breath.

  * * * * *

  Aubrey awoke blind and floating in the warm, heavy liquid of what could only be a medical tank. He’d been in one once before after a nasty glider spill. The thick fluid 8

  Morgan Hawke

  labored in and then out of his lungs. He couldn’t move, and his mind didn’t want to process properly. He could barely think. He was still alive. Damn it.

  Sleep crushed him under. He didn’t fight it. Awareness was something he was not interested in having.

  * * * * *

  He dreamed, of sweeping starscapes and a gentle female presence. “Stay with me,” she whispered. “Don’t leave me. I don’t want to be alone.”

  Out of sheer reflex, he reached out. He didn’t want to be alone either.

  She folded around him with lithe grace and warmth.

  His body responded to the comfort she offered. He reached for more, knowing it was a dream and wanting it to be more. He reached until he could almost feel softness under his hands and against his skin. The dream shifted, becoming a body intimately entwined with his. He could almost taste her mouth against his. His cock hardened.

  She responded with shuddering delight and opened, offering herself.

  He held her tight and arched into her. The impression of tight, wet warmth blazed hot down his spine and concentrated around his cock. He clutched her to him, relishing the feeling of physical delight with another, something he had yet to have.

  She moved against him, delivering the most riveting and delightful sensation he’d ever felt.

  The sensation was so strong, he could feel his sleeping body bucking in response.

  He moved against her, begging for more.

  She complied with enthusiasm and reached for him. Abruptly, part of her entered him.

  Delight speared through him and urgency tightened within him. Somewhere in the back of his mind an alarm went off, but the pleasure of her touch was so intense, he didn’t care. She was going to make him cum.

  She touched him deeper.

  Delight crested and release took him violently. The feeling of his balls emptying in something warm burned up his spine. His howl of release was muffled by the liquid in his lungs.

  Then she took him again.

  And again.

  * * * * *

  Aubrey awoke, still in the liquid tank and still blind, but he wasn’t alone. Someone was in his head with him. “Hello?”

  Interstellar Service & Discipline: Lost Star

  9

  “Hello, Aubrey.” It was the female presence that had been in his dreams. “I am Niobe.”

  Awake and aware, Aubrey suddenly recognized the presence for what it was. He reeled in shock. It was the ship. He had made love to the ship. And it had been incredible.

  A second presence, dark and sharp-edged, pressed against the edges of his mind.

  Aubrey flinched away, but it remained at the limit of his thoughts. “What is that?”

  “Don’t look there.” Niobe radiated sharp fear. “It’s the nav-pilot. She will hurt you if she finds you looking.”

  “What?” He writhed away but couldn’t gain any distance. “What is the nav-pilot doing inside my head?” He shook his head in the tank and felt the pull of a data-jack plugged into the back of his head. Fuck. They had jacked into his mind and somehow gotten in past his firewalls and alarms. Anger burned. The firewalls weren’t his only defense. He had other ways of dealing with intruders.

  “No, you can’t fight her.”

  “Oh yes I can.”

  “No, you can’t. You’ve been mapped. If you try to fight her, she will use your own programs against you.”

  “Mapped? I don’t remember…”

  “Yes, while you slept. You seemed to find the experience pleasurable.”

  “Pleasurable?” He flinched in shock. The dream… His mind had been mapped by a wet dream, giving Moribund access to his programs.

  “Yes.”

  Fury seared through him. “Anything else I should know about?”

  “You’ve been slave-drived and configured as an executable.”

  “What?” He sucked in a hard breath, and his lungs labored with the additional liquid. “I’m an executable program? I’m something to turn on and shut down when you feel like it?”

  She pulled back from him. “To the nav-pilot you are.”

  “No! I’m not a fucking program!” Something shifted in the back of his mind. He scanned the data being accessed. It was the hijack code and the breaker code. Bleeding Fate! “Niobe, are we attacking a ship?”

  “Yes.”

  “No. I won’t kill people!”

  “Aubrey, you are not killing anyone, the nav-pilot is.”

  “It’s my program—”

  “You’re not executing it, the nav-pilot is.”

  10

  Morgan Hawke

  “It’s still my program, and it’s being used to kill people!” Aubrey gathered himself for a hard shove. “I will not do this!”

  “No, don’t! You don’t want to touch her mind!”

  “Why the hell not?”

  “Aubrey, she’s insane. She could kill you.”

  He grabbed for the stream of data. “Then I die. I’m supposed to be dead anyway.”

  The stream was pried out of his hold.

  No! He used every trick he had to stop the data flow…and couldn’t. He tried to erase the code. It was one of his favorites and he hated the idea of killing it, but he would not let his code be used in this way…and couldn’t. Despite the fact that his programs were in his own encoding language, somehow a passcode had been tacked on, sealing it off. He didn’t have access to his own data.

  “No! I won’t do this!” Aubrey fought the restraints that held him, jerking hard and twisting to dislodge the jack in his head. Something rushed into his veins, numbing his brain and slowing his thoughts. Sleep began to press hard against his mind. He was being drugged.

  “Yes,” Niobe whispered. “You’re being given a sedative.”

  “It’s to keep me from fighting them.”

  “You cannot fight them. It’s to keep you from hurting yourself.”

  The data stream stopped. They had gained access. Somewhere out there, a ship was killing her crew. And it was his fault. Thick black guilt squeezed his heart, even as his body stilled in response to the drugs in his blood. “Niobe, if I can’t keep them out, I need to die. I won’t be used to kill people.”

  “You will not die.”

  Aubrey fought to hold on to consciousness. “Niobe, I can’t live this way, as a program to be used.”

  “You will live.”

  “I can’t—”

  “You will.”

  Sleep crushed him under.

  * * * * *

  Aubrey awoke, still blind, still in the tank, with someone rummaging around in his head. He slammed doors closed, only to have them pried open. He changed passcodes and rearranged his files, only to have them changed on him. He pulled every firewall and blocking trick he could think of…and they still got in.

  He howled in fury and slammed a thick wall of anger at whoever was digging in his head.

  Interstellar Service & Discipline: Lost Star

  11<
br />
  A fist of moldering, acidic rot closed around his mind. “Bad boy,” it hissed. “Give me!” Barbed burning things squirmed through his wall of anger and burrowed deep into his mind, eating their way into his thoughts.

  He screamed and shoved away from it. “Get out! Get out of my head!”

  It didn’t let him go. “Give me, now!”

  “No!” He writhed in an acid bath that tore his thoughts to shreds and ate the pieces. He thrashed in the tank and tried to scream.

  Hands grasped the acid things and pulled them away. “Nav-pilot, stop!” Niobe’s mental voice vibrated with anger and terror. “You’re causing damage!”

  Aubrey gasped in shuddering relief. The liquid in the tank hid his tears.

  “Bad boy! Give me what I want!”

  “Nav-pilot, not this way!” Niobe moved between them, pushing the acidic touch from his mind. “Give me access, and I’ll get it for you.”

  “How?”

  Comfort spilled across Aubrey’s mind. Erotic pleasure spilled down his spine and poured into his cock. He froze in shock. “Niobe? What are you doing?” Her presence filled his mind and molded around him with the powerful sensation of flesh against flesh. His body responded. He couldn’t stop it. “Niobe!”

  “Oh.” The nav-pilot purred. “Seduction.”

  Sensation raced through his body. Phantom kisses and caresses that he could feel, but weren’t there. He fought the drugging pull of rising climax, but his body wanted the pleasure of release she was offering. “Niobe, please! Don’t do this to me.” His balls tightened with urgency. He was going to cum, and when he did, she would take whatever it was the nav-pilot was after. “Niobe! This is rape.”

  “I know.” Her mental voice echoed with regret and entered him.

  He came, bucking hard. His mind opened under the whitewash of blinding pleasure.

  She speared deeper into him, burning him with searing delight.

  He shuddered and felt climax rise again. “Niobe, don’t!” He tried to fight his body’s animalistic reactions and couldn’t. “Niobe, please!”

  “I’m sorry, Aubrey, but they will have your compliance, or they will kill you. I will not let you die.”

  He came again, screaming into the liquid.

  * * * * *

  Time passed marked by dreams of swimming through an ocean of stars

  punctuated by stronger dreams of sex. Aubrey fought against the visceral pleasure pouring into his body, knowing that his mind was being taken while he cried out in release.

  12

  Morgan Hawke

  Niobe’s sweet nature made it difficult to fight her. She had to be the gentlest ship-mind he’d ever had contact with. Her affection and desperate sorrow throbbed against his mind every time she brought him to unwilling release, but her conviction that she was saving him from certain death made her continue.

  He pleaded with her to let him go, to let him die.

  She wouldn’t. He was the only thing she had, and she would not let him go. She pleaded with him to forget them, to just let go and let them take what they wanted.

  He would not stop fighting. What they were using him for was wrong.

  She knew and regretted it deeply. He could feel how she ached with every death her ship caused. But she took him anyway.

  Interstellar Service & Discipline: Lost Star

  13

  Chapter Three

  Aubrey awoke feeling the liquid bubbling around him. They were draining the tank. His head cleared the fluid, but his eyes still refused to function. He could hear voices, but his ears were too full to make out what they were saying. He sucked in a breath to ask what was going on.

  His body revolted, and he spewed viscous gunk from his mouth and nose. His head, lungs, and stomach ached long before he was done. The air was ice-cold compared to the warm bath of the tank.

  He was released from the harness and pulled from the tank naked. Aubrey counted four hands, so two people. He collapsed into their hands, too weak to lift his head.

  He was lifted onto an anti-grav table and floated somewhere. Moments later, the table stopped and hot water sprayed down on him.

  He jerked in alarm.

  Hands held him down on the table. They washed every inch of him in the most impersonal manner possible. After a humiliating eternity, the bath finally ended, and Aubrey was helped upright, then onto his feet.

  He wavered off balance between them. His ears abruptly cleared.

  “There, that wasn’t so bad.” The voice was deep, an older male.

  “At least this one isn’t augmented to hell and gone.” The second voice seemed even older and also male.

  “According to medical, he’s not augmented at all. If he was augmented, we could have used force cuffs to hold him upright.”

  Aubrey smiled sourly. “Sorry to disappoint you.” It felt strange to use his mouth to talk.

  14

  Morgan Hawke

  The first man snorted. “Oh, so your ears are working after all?”

  “Yeah.” He shivered. “But my eyes are all messed up.”

  “Tank liquid.” Fingers dug into his left upper arm to keep him balanced on his feet, and turned Aubrey to the side. “You look wasted, but your muscles appear to be working just fine.”

  Aubrey rolled his eyes. “My muscles are not working fine. I can barely stand.”

  One of the men snorted. “You’ve been getting some kind of exercise in there, or you wouldn’t be able to stand at all.”

  Aubrey frowned. All those dreams of swimming through stars… Had he been exercised while he slept?

  The water collector went on with a loud howl, sucking all the moisture from the air in seconds.

  Aubrey shivered. It was cold in the room. He was shoved forward between the men. The tile under his bare feet became metal plate, and he was stopped.

  Hands cupped his elbows. “Lift your foot.”

  Aubrey lifted his foot and was helped into what felt like a full-body ship-suit. The fabric was thickly padded, warm and very welcome. He sealed it closed with fumbling fingers. “How long?”

  Socks were tugged onto his feet. “‘How long’ what, kid?”

  “How long have I been in the tank?” Aubrey lifted his feet for a pair of boots.

  “Um, let’s see…”

  The boots were fastened closed. The damned things actually fit better than his last pair he’d worn. Aubrey felt something itching on his neck. He scratched at it and discovered that it was his own hair. It was past his shoulders. He froze. He’d been in the tank long enough for his hair to grow that long from a buzz cut?

  “I’m not sure. You’ve been in that tank since I got on board three cycles ago.

  Aubrey lifted his head. “Three thirty-day cycles?”

  “Oh, longer than that.” The other man chuckled. “I’m thinking at least two more.”

  Aubrey felt his knees shake beneath him. “Five cycles?” He was tugged forward and out into a carpeted hallway.

  “Let’s see, I think the limit is nine cycles, and they told us to pull you because you’d reached the limit.”

  Aubrey tripped on the carpet. “Are you saying I’ve been in that tank for nine cycles?” He couldn’t grasp being in the tank that amount of time. It hadn’t seemed that long at all. “So now where am I going?”

  “Right now? Where they told us to put you.”

  Aubrey dug in his heels. “You’re not putting me in that tank again!”

  The older man laughed. “Oh hell no, you can’t go back in there. Stay in there too long and you won’t be able to function outside it.” They tugged him forward.

  Interstellar Service & Discipline: Lost Star

  15

  Aubrey walked. It was that or be dragged. “Then what?”

  “What were you in it for?”

  Aubrey stiffened. They didn’t know? “I was in it, I think, for lung damage.”

  “Lung damage?”

  “That must have been some damage to n
eed breathing liquid.”

  Aubrey clenched his jaw. “I suppose one too many visits to the airlock would do that.”

  “The airlock? Who’d you kill?”

  “Who did I kill?” Aubrey chuckled, and the chuckle became outright laughter. He threw back his head, laughing as the tears burned down his cheeks. He finally stopped, gasping for breath. “How many ships in the past nine months?”

  “Are you okay, kid?”

  Aubrey looked up with his sightless eyes and screamed. “How many ships did this fucking ship take in the past nine months?”

  “Uh, forty-seven, I think.”

  Aubrey’s knees gave out, and he dropped to his hands and knees. “Bleeding Fate…” There were hundreds of lives on some of those ships, and thousands on others.

  “Come on, get up.” They worked to pull him upright.

  Aubrey climbed unsteadily onto his feet. “You want to know who I killed?” The hurt was so large, he couldn’t quite feel it. “I killed every bloody man aboard every bloody ship you took.”

  “What?”

  “The kid’s hysterical…”

  Aubrey allowed them to tug him forward. He’d killed forty-seven ships. And he was going to kill more if they jacked him back into the ship. He couldn’t physically fight them. He was completely blind and without a drop of physical augmentation. He couldn’t mentally fight them. The ship was too strong, and the nav-pilot was too crazy.

  He had to die. It was the only way to stop the killing.

  A vibration raced under Aubrey’s feet. There was a distant howl of metal.

  “What the hell was that?”

  Aubrey smiled. He knew exactly what that was. He remembered it from his own ship. “We’re under attack.”

  The man on Aubrey’s right jerked. “We can’t be…?”

  The man on his left released Aubrey’s arm. “Yes we can. I heard that we’ve been in Skeldhi space for two days now.”